HEY. Posting this here, not because I have terrible things to say, but just because the HMD meme is pretty much the love meme, and this got tl;dr anyway.
I love your John, and I am so glad that Sarah has him, and that I get to play with you. <3 That said, I'd really love to see more of his inner thoughts/more emotional reactions to stuff? I know he's a lot calmer and better at controlling his emotions than Sarah is, but even so, sometimes it seems like he's focused too much on just getting stuff done and never lets much of anything really get to him.
For example, when Delta told him about Sarah being trapped by SHODAN, his immediate reaction was "Okay, I need weapons/intel/whatever." [paraphrasing!] There wasn't even the slightest pause where he went "...what? Oh, shit." Or when he contacted York, believing he'd just killed his mom, it wasn't "Where the fuck is York I'm gonna kill him" but rather "I need to talk to him."
Again, I know John's a lot more...emotionally stable than Sarah is, and I'm not trying to say you should turn him into her and have him fly off the handle at every little thing.;) But he's still human, and even if it's internalized (his inner thoughts in [brackets] or whatever) I'd still like to see more of how he reacts to stuff? This is purely my own personal preference, but I love the angsty/emotional stuff, and Sarah and John have a lot of potential for nice meaty emotional (or more often, fail!emoting) scenes that I'd love to play out with you.
Just my two cents.:) And again, I love your John and I think we both have a pretty similar interpretation on his and Sarah's relationship, which is awesome. I'm always willing to talk here/on AIM, if I'm not making any sense or you want to talk or anything.:)
I really do appreciate this and I can see exactly what you're talking about. The problem is he does internalize it so much and clearly I haven't been doing a good enough job showing that. In the case with York though the intention was to kill York he just figured he might get a better response by not announcing it over the network. Maybe I miscalculated on that however.
Please do know though that he was going oh shit the moment he heard about Sarah and SHODAN, he just knows panic doesn't help. I will take you suggestion and try using brackets or something similar to make it clear that on the inside at least he's a lot more emotional than he appears.
Please don't ever hesitate to bring things like this up because I always want to improve if I can.
Aaah yeah, that makes sense that he wouldn't announce it - but yeah, without any insight into what John was thinking, it wasn't clear that he was planning to do more than just ask York what exactly was going on/that he had any kind of freakout regarding SHODAN. I think showing more of his thought process/inner emotion will definitely help.:)
And thank you for being so awesome and receptive to crit! ♥
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2011-03-19 10:05 pm (UTC)I love your John, and I am so glad that Sarah has him, and that I get to play with you. <3 That said, I'd really love to see more of his inner thoughts/more emotional reactions to stuff? I know he's a lot calmer and better at controlling his emotions than Sarah is, but even so, sometimes it seems like he's focused too much on just getting stuff done and never lets much of anything really get to him.
For example, when Delta told him about Sarah being trapped by SHODAN, his immediate reaction was "Okay, I need weapons/intel/whatever." [paraphrasing!] There wasn't even the slightest pause where he went "...what? Oh, shit." Or when he contacted York, believing he'd just killed his mom, it wasn't "Where the fuck is York I'm gonna kill him" but rather "I need to talk to him."
Again, I know John's a lot more...emotionally stable than Sarah is, and I'm not trying to say you should turn him into her and have him fly off the handle at every little thing.;) But he's still human, and even if it's internalized (his inner thoughts in [brackets] or whatever) I'd still like to see more of how he reacts to stuff? This is purely my own personal preference, but I love the angsty/emotional stuff, and Sarah and John have a lot of potential for nice meaty emotional (or more often, fail!emoting) scenes that I'd love to play out with you.
Just my two cents.:) And again, I love your John and I think we both have a pretty similar interpretation on his and Sarah's relationship, which is awesome. I'm always willing to talk here/on AIM, if I'm not making any sense or you want to talk or anything.:)
no subject
Date: 2011-03-19 10:16 pm (UTC)Please do know though that he was going oh shit the moment he heard about Sarah and SHODAN, he just knows panic doesn't help. I will take you suggestion and try using brackets or something similar to make it clear that on the inside at least he's a lot more emotional than he appears.
Please don't ever hesitate to bring things like this up because I always want to improve if I can.
no subject
Date: 2011-03-19 10:30 pm (UTC)And thank you for being so awesome and receptive to crit! ♥
no subject
Date: 2011-03-19 10:32 pm (UTC)